Seems that all around me things are changing. Everything is changing. Since my last post...just the other day...you know my housing has changed. Funny thing is happening on my way to April 15th this year, I'm changing to 80! Now there's a number! 80!
How does it feel? I dun-no! Actually, it feels great, absolutely great. Interestingly, I'm younger. Yes, younger. On the inside, still in my 30's, on the inside of my head that is. The body, well that's another issue. Though things are changing there too, my outlook on the whole thing is surprisingly upbeat. I'm the most comfortable with myself than I have ever been. I do things that I want to do. Want as in choose to do. Not from a selfish point of view but rather a considered decision based on is it a good thing for me and others to do what I think I want to do. That's a whole other take on living if you truly think about it.
In the past I did things because, I should...someone told me to...I had to...it was the right thing to do...there wasn't a choice...it's what I always do, etc.. It's different now, oh, it's the same but the thought behind why I do what I do is different. I do consider the why of it. Truly, I think about why and do I really need to or want to or should I. I have a new freedom to choose. It was always there only now I'm brave enough to look at the choice. Seems like my choices now are acceptable to myself. In other words I'm happy with my choices more so now than before.
Why now?
Maybe because I've lived through so much life. You know, good, bad, hard, easy, life and death. I've been around the block so to speak. There's just not a lot of really new things going on around me that I haven't experienced in some way or another. Someone said "most crisis' last just 2 weeks." followed by "you can do anything for 2 weeks". Of course that 2 weeks isn't scientifically calculated but the idea is a good one. When all things are considered in any crisis how bad is it, all things considered? Of course that depends on what the crisis is, but think about it. Two weeks in time isn't very long at all. Only while you are in the midst of that 2 weeks.
Well, I'm talking about this because in just a couple of months I will turn 80 and I feel better now than I have in years in all areas of my life. I'm more at liberty in nearly all aspects that I can think of. I live alone which has great advantages if you don't get bogged down in being lonely, and that can be a decision to be made. I do pretty much what I want to do. I'm a crafter and I like to write and paint and build things. I've learned how to rewire a chandelier, work on a clock, build with power tools and repurpose things for my purposes. I don't do without much. If I need something I can usually make it and that is invigorating to me. I have a real tool box with power tools, a 3 step ladder, work gloves, paint brushes, sand paper and all kinds of things to use to make the things I want or think I need.
One day I decided I needed a foot stool so I made one out of a cardboard box an old pillow and material plus hot glue. It lasted several months until I got tired of it and threw it away. My friends think I can do anything...I can't, but I can do what they think they can't do. Because I think I can. Is what I do perfect, or will it last a life time, probably not but it does the job for me and that's all I need.
Part of my life now is attitude. I don't pay a lot of attention to what other's think about what I do or what I wear and stuff like that. Not anymore. Just that adjustment in my thinking has freed a whole aspect of life up for me. I choose to enjoy everything. I choose to laugh, make fun of hard things and say nice things. I choose to think good things and enjoy as much in a day as possible. I don't watch a lot of news or anything that is unpleasant. I already know about that side of life. I know it exists and I choose not to entertain it in my life. I pray about those things when I think I'm suppose to but I don't worry about things I can't change. I've learned to look to the written word of God in the Bible as my life guide and do what He says to do in life. He's got me covered and I know that so there's nothing for me to worry about. After all, He loved me first and has known me before I was in my mother's womb. He is after all the Creator of all that there is and with that in mind it's up to me to Love Him first above all else.
I'm Judy and I'm writing this from my new makeover bedroom/ craft room combo of which I'm delighted to be in this evening. Hope you are well where you are and content with your life. God Bless You and good night.
Milo
Comments